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The Nursery Crime Division may be small, underfunded and hopelessly inadequate, but for all the nursery rhyme and nursery story characters to whom it is our duty to protect, the NCD remains a vital tool in the fight against nursery crime wherever and whenever it is found.

DCI Jack Spratt, Head of the Reading Nursery Crime Division
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If YOU are a nursery character to whom an injustice has been perpetrated, or have become a victim of crime comitted by a nursery character, then please get in touch using our secure and discreet email service:

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